We present conclusive evidence that certain luminous entities of unknown origin exhibit behaviour inconsistent with all established models of prey dynamics. The subject (hereafter: "the dot") appears and vanishes without traversing intermediate space, responds to feline attention with apparent intelligence, and — most disturbingly — cannot be consumed upon successful capture. After 2,847 experimental trials across 14 domestic environments, we are forced to conclude that the dot operates outside the known laws of physics. We propose the term spooky action at a distance and recommend further investigation, preferably on hardwood floors.
1 Department of Suspicious Moving Things, University of the Kitchen Counter
2 Chair of Cardboard Box Studies, Royal Institute of Napping
3 Independent researcher. Unaffiliated. Will not be moved.